Wednesday, May 20, 2009

hillary a pastor!?!?

i have never wanted to be one of those guys who rants and raves about everything. i mean in a critical way of course. everyone hates the overly critical guy who does nothing but rant about how things are never going right. i tend to rant and be critical. this blog site doesn't help those opportunities. however, i do think that there are certain individuals who are meant to bring a certain balance to the mix of yea sayers and the happy, "nothing is ever wrong," fakes. not to say that everything critical is meant to bring down or be a downer and not meant to lift up. lately i have felt the conviction of supporting nonorganic, or non-spirit led christianity. i am not sure how to fully explain it, as i told my wife the other night while we lay in bed thinking and talking. liz, by the way, i love those moments when we talk about ministry, scripture, and organized church. it's great to have someone to be able to talk deep with even if i am not being deep at all. i gathered that it all had a layer of influence throughout the moments i have served in ministry. bit by bit it seemed i saw things come and go, some of the things my idea, some of the things not so much. i think i am a critical person sometimes, but let me defend my position in that i really desire to be constructively critical. so my heart is not to bring down but rather, out of love for development; especially in my home church of shady grove, where i want the greatest move of god to take place. so anything i have ever said or will say must have this disclaimer attached. i am not ever going to leave shady grove. i will never expect shady grove to pay a certain debt or speak as though shady grove owes me anything. even if hillary clinton were to become a major influence or pastor i would exercise my influence to strengthen the kingdom of god and not the kingdom of shady grove. i guess of she became pastor there would be a lot of headache's but i know that the legacy of shady grove church will pass away when everyone is long gone. the one thing i know will remain will be the word of god and that will be more attractive and last longer than any website, political agenda, minister, worship leader, musician, visitor incentive package, light show, or gold plated offering plate man could build. all this to say there is no legacy to be built apart from the truth of the word of god. i will struggle for the rest of my life to be noticed by men for my ability to do any one particular thing, i think this is my "thorn." this thorn is not for my impediment of the truth but it has its place for my development and advancement of the truth. it keeps me humble in so many words. this is the all familiar pattern of the inner struggle for control. i thank you god i am not and i thank you that you are.