smaller focus for the bigger picture

my time here in belgium has been short but simply fantastic. i do, however, think about my life in texas, all my friends, of course my family, and i can quickly get homesick. they mean the world to me. i would not trade any of them for anything.

liz and i moved here to belgium for ministry purposes. we had desires to be world changers and saviors of dying movements. we longed to influence the region with a sight to transform the continent of europe. i wouldn't say we strategized to duplicate the stateside success that we had grown to appreciate in its entirety. i will say that we would've been foolish to start from scratch and attempt to re-invent the wheel.

our vision upon our launch here included a team. many of you may know them. team ministry is always preferred to lone-ranger effort. that is, i prefer team ministry. i am aware of many leaders who have pioneered on their own and have followed the lord's desires and as a result found great success for the kingdom of god. i have always felt that as my calling, to work with a team. since liz and i moved here we naturally found and built relationships with those already laboring in the land and those who have emerged since our work began.

since our launch we have experienced a shift in focus. part of this is due to the team we moved here with are now back in the states continuing on into what god is calling them for the next season. for my family this has required we shift a focus and aim our sights in a different direction, but with the same idea of declaring the kingdom of the lord.

honestly, we didn't realize the impact of the shift until the last few months. since then, we have been working towards making an impact on the local church level. with the team we were able to do many, many things. some of the things we did well and some we should've done better, but over all we were traveling with a different mindset. we did camps, church prayer nights, led worship around europe, preached, prophesied, and a number of other not so extravagant things. but it HAD to change for me and my family.

one of the biggest lessons i have learned concerns expectations. i had them moving here to belgium, i had them when i ministered with the team, i had them as the team began transitioning out, and i have them still. god has taught me to have expectations, and even more specifically for this year, to constantly engage myself in the battle of not doing things just because they have always been done that way. rigid traditions have a hard time moving most of the time, i have learned that they usually break because of their stiffness and end up irreparable.

it is very common to meet someone who has an opinion of the church (that's not really news). this opinion is shaped by the expectations, the expectations are shaped by perception. i have learned while living in belgium, when my expectations fail, or are not attained, it is imperative to look first at my perception. i evaluate my perception, to see if it is in the right place? most of the time if my expectation is crushed it isn't because of an outside influence as much as it is a perspective that was wrong to begin with. this is the hard thing to do when you want to change the world, because everyone else is the problem, not you. but when expectations go south train yourself to first evaluate your perception of the problem; look at the implications of what you are expecting. i can't tell you how many times my evaluation has led me to a life-changing shift in how god truly sees me. i want so badly to perform for him and meet his approval of my plan to change europe for him, that is not what he is asking me to do. a faulty perception, especially in ministry will skew your expectation EVERY time. things aren't changing fast enough, i am not able to raise enough money right now, the church sings songs from 20 years ago, they all use computers from 1995, no one is listening to me, everyone is too complacent, everyone is too old, the young people don't want to do anything, and the list goes on and on. god is using these experiences to shift my focus for HIS bigger picture.

when your expectations aren't met, shift your focus to yourself, evaluate your perception. as a result, might find that whatever you are doing right then and there...you are so content to just be used by god that the results (especially after failed expectations) would not discourage your determination.

mom and dad in belgium

this summer was such a wonderful experience for our family. we had been planning this for well over 6 months to have my parents come to our house here in belgium and for us to go visit liz's family in alaska.

before i begin, in the spring my dad had suffered a severe bicycling accident that would require major surgeries and rehabilitation. it put strain on the planning of their visit to our house here. he would be required to miss a lot of work. thankfully, he had put in the vacation spots for the days they were here at the beginning of the year so the trip wasn't effected by the need for many days off of work. however, due to his weeks of needed rest and rehabilitation he was forced to use vacation days and sick leave while not working. this meant that he had to take a short, unpaid leave while on vacation here in belgium. not cool.

still, it was cheaper for them to fly here, even while taking unpaid leave, then for my whole family (2 adults, 2 kids, and infant) to dallas. weird, i know. i wish flying was cheaper, as do most people who fly i am sure.

this was a huge trip for my dad. he had never been out of the united states. this required him to get a passport for the first time in his life. over 50 years without needing a passport! maybe that is not as big of a deal as i think it is but it sure seems amazing considering how much people move around these days.

there was so much anticipation. if you follow me on twitter, then you could attest to the many tweets concerning numbers and countdowns, we were so excited for them to be here. we had it all planned out, going to give them the belgian experience of the trains and food. the morning of their arrival we left the house around 7:30 on the train to go get them. we got to the airport and then it started to rain as we were headed home on the train. as soon as we got to the rhode train station i ran to my house to get the car. need less to say, it was not a great welcome to belgium experience. mom and dad were very tired and dad was hurting a little from soreness in his body due to the bicycling accident.

over the next two weeks we had so much fun. we visited our key spots, went downtown, visited the seaside, rode numerous trains, played in the parks, experienced el grecco, and had wonderful chats about life and things that are changing in the dallas area. i was so grateful for their presence in our house. for my dad it was also his first time to be able to hold and play with finn, our youngest.

liz and i got to celebrate our anniversary (month later) in amsterdam...WITHOUT KIDS!!! i was so excited to travel with my bride to amsterdam and get a wonderful 2 days with her all to myself.

next to the last night i had such a major breakdown. going down to my parents room i told them everything i felt. at times in my life over here i feel like i am hurting them because they are denied the times to be had with grand children; especially if you know my mom who loves them so much. i hate that. i told them i was sorry and really do wish it was different. my mom and dad both are confident i am doing what the lord is calling me to do over here in belgium. that is so pleasing to know and comforting.

i look forward to our next adventure together. hopefully they can make traveling to belgium an annual experience.

love you mom and dad.

au revoir carlsbourg

bittersweet. that was pretty much how i felt for this convention de jeunesse 2012. this isn't the last year that c-j will be taking place but is the last year in carlsbourg.

it is bittersweet due to the fact that i gained so much revelation the first year i attended c-j in this facility. the memories and discussions of the eerie feelings of haunted hallways and our plans of strategic get-a-ways in case of a zombie attack. not to mention i love youth camps and the whole youth conference feel. and yet, this facility is so old and outdated. it will be nice to move to a newer facility that can handle the growing demand of youth wanting to attend. it will also be nice for a facility to have adequate sleeping conditions.

it takes you a while sometimes to get to know something. since our first year in 2008, i feel as though i finally got to know this facility and now that i know it we are moving to another location for next year. but make no mistake, i will never forget this place. 2008, 2009, 2011

i'm already looking ghostly

this wasn't at c-j

lets call it dash

there is a wonderful new addition to the lowrie household. no, i am not talking about a little soul...yet.

it so fun and exciting to see god provide something right before your very eyes. this whole process of provision has been an adventure that will forever mark my heart.

it was a big deal. when liz and i moved here there was so much shifting that took place. even the very week when we moved liz had to change job posts, we weren't able to move into the location we originally thought was available for us and so many little detailed changes took place which far too many really to get into at this time.

a huge reality was not having a vehicle to commute daily to the things that were going on around us. thankfully we moved into a situation where our team was very understanding and able to accommodate us in our transportation needs (GO TEAM 9TH HOUR!!!).

soon enough we found our groove and those little cultural shortcuts that made life much, much easier. the bus became my friend with my boys as we would take it every morning to dutch's first school. similarly, the train was liz's friend as she rode it over and over until she figured the belgian system. it really become fun for me as the boys' faces would light up at every train riding opportunity.

there is no cool way to spin it...i have a station wagon

when the school dutch was attending informed us that they would not be continuing the next year we had very little options. we, along with our team's kids, put dutch into another school that is not too far away but still required a good walk. dutch became good at a little pedal-less bike that he rode as i pushed tites in the stroller every morning to to school. this routine was working well in the months that were temperature friendly. however, once the winter began to settle in we had to take our transportation to another level...i got a bike and a little kid trailer to pull them. we tucked it with blankets and i packed them both in very tightly with coats and hats. me, i had quite a few rides where i was glad my boys couldn't hear my frustrations venting. it was a good time for me as i poured out my feelings on needing a vehicle. well, god heard...per usual.

we saved and saved every penny we could. we asked and asked everyone we knew to ask for help. i didn't want to borrow money for a car. i have taken that road before and i was not in a place financially to rely on the payment being there. call it lack of faith, call it extreme faith, call it whatever you want but i kind of took pride in the suffering.

the tape deck was essential for iPod usage

anyway, we finally came up with an amount that would get us something decent. maybe not brand spanking new, but decent to last us and get us from point a to point b. i had been giving guitar lessons to a young man in the youth group and this was raising some money. his father who is originally from iran, was always asking me about a car and telling me that i needed to get a bmw 520 series. that sounded nice, but not realistic.

one day after many, many, many emails to many individuals i found a car online that was a bmw and looked ok for our budget. we called and set an appointment up to go look at it. i knew nothing about bmw's much less the belgian system of buying cars (there are some things that are slightly different). i called my best belgian friend, jon vandeput, and the guy who always told me to get bmw's, ahmed. they both came with me to look at this car. it turned out to be a bust. on the way back home as i was taking ahmed home he turned to me and said, "zach, do you really want to buy a car?" i was taken back a little because i wasn't sure what he thought we WERE JUST DOING. i emphatically replied, YES!" we went to a garage in a little town close to waterloo called braine l'alleud (bren-lah-luh). we walked into this little lot area that was hidden off the main road and there were quite a few cars being sold there. i held in my deck of cards the trump card that was going to get me the deal i needed...a middle eastern man. ahmed, was gold i tell you, GOLD!

we walked into this place and everyone knew him by name and he was like their long time family member who didn't come around unless he needed something. as we walked around looking for a car in my price range of 2500 euros (about $3000) i found this gem. i asked ahmed about it and he said, "is this the one?" i said nervously, "i don't know." it was a lot of money that i had saved for a long time and i didn't want to throw it away. ahmed said let me take care of it. the dealer said it was 2000 euros but with passed inspection. i could over hear ahmed telling the guy to come down and make a better price. the guy came down to 1850 but without inspection. ahmed, again, i could tell, was looking the guy in the eye and very emphatically told him to "come on!" the guy said ok with inspection 1850.

YES!!! it happened, i got it! i was so pumped and came home to tell the family the good news. after a couple of weeks of back and forth (it didn't pass inspection the first time but ahmed told them to fix the problem and they did) i finally took the boys to the garage and drove home in our very own car.

on the way there i was asking the boys, because they too shared the excitement, "what shall we name our car?" dutch replied, "mcqueen" (after the character in the disney cars movie). i didn't think it was a good name. he then changed his mind and said, "no, lets call it dash!"

perfect.

easy does it

cold reflections

just so you know today is cold. it is so cold i don't even want to look at the temperature because it won't do justice to what kind of cold it really is.

taking dutch to school this morning with the trailer was brutal. that wind against my face made my petitions to the lord to provide a car much much louder.

today will be a great day to work inside. i am prepping for a worship seminar in morocco that al and i will be teaching. we leave wednesday. this is my first trip to the arab world, i am very excited.

je veux te voire dans ma vie

explanation, give it to me!!! i wish i could. every year i attend the cj i return home stirred, provoked, and inspired to plow a little deeper, dig a little harder, and sow the seed a little farther. this year is not any different.

in reality the cj is where it began for most of the team. this was our 3rd in attendance in just 4 years as a 9th hour squadron and our sphere of influence is growing only by the grace of the lord. confirming what he is saying to us, as a team, he is also demonstrating in events such as these. spontaneous songs, healings, awakened hearts and most importantly transformation into a submitted life unto his calling are all what you would have found here if you had attended.

this year we were able to have more of a direction in the look of the stage. i think this years stage design was one of the best this conference has seen. you can see in some of the photos from our facebook page that we really made an effort in giving the stage a look that would draw attention to whoever was leading worship or whoever was just on the stage.

upon leading worship we were able to lead the group in a few of the french songs that we wrote and there was a great response to these songs. allyster did a tremendous job leading the congregation in french along with laetitia. after one of our worship sets there arose a spontaneous song from the youth. you can see what it was like here:

here is a different video that allyster had filmed while on stage. we, as a band, stopped playing because the expression from the young people was so overwhelmingly marvelous that we just let them express their hearts as you can see they did in the video.

it is really starting to feel ground breaking for me personally. i have been able to witness things that seem to have made an impact. now it is starting to gain momentum and be very consistent. i truly see the lord moving amongst these people in marvelous ways.